School

Next year Ellery starts Kindergarten. She is excited - beyond belief. I, on the other hand, wish I could make time stand still for just a bit longer. The idea of her being in school ALL day makes me sad. I know I will miss her terribly.

Here in Atlanta, with Kindergarten comes the talk of public versus private school. Just thinking about it exhausts me. It exhausts me to the point that I have uttered on more than one occasion "I think I will homeschool the girls." There is something very enticing about the idea. This morning I read this excerpt from the blog "Life in Grace."

Edie was a family practitioner who decided to bid farewell to medicine to homeschool her children.

Fast forward three years and here are some of things I’ve learned about myself while homeschooling my children.

I am impatient. I don’t have the fortitude to stick with tasks like I should. I am weak and undisciplined and lack the courage of my convictions. I talk about self-control but don’t have very much. I teach my girls to treat people with kindness but then I lack compassion with my own family. I am a hypocrite and a real honest to goodness sinner. I struggle with contentment and then get angry with them for their discontent. I see in them my own sins and failures and then withhold mercy when they need it most.

This task of teaching my children has broken me.

They see through all my charades.

I can’t hide myself from them.

I reread that paragraph at least 5 times. I can relate - can you?